Ten Terrific Twitter Testimonials 14
April 11, 2011
Today is 4-11-11. That’s a 4 with 4 ones and 1+1+1+1=4. In numerology that means you will read Tweets.
- Hey Wendy’s… how do you change your fry recipe in its entirety, but they’re still flaccid as a 90 year old man that hates taking pills?
- I’m so tired, it’s not even funny. Matter of fact, I’m so tired it’s not even Jimmy Fallon.
- People with a Napoleon Complex require much growth. – #RUFucius
- Man, I think they called it a pound cake because it pummels your taste buds black and blue with deliciousness.
- Hmmm… since these dummies were shooting about 12 hours ago, I believe the forecast in Detroit is cloudy with a chance of bullet rain. (For those that don’t know, sometimes people shoot in the air on January 1.)
- If you know anyone that emptied their gun in the air to ring in the new year… rob them. They are defenseless.
- The Oprah Winfrey Network starts today. I can hardly disguise my excitement erection.
- I’m eating dark chocolate from Trader Joe’s to keep me alert. I can actually feel it coursing through me like a radioactive spider bite.
- RT @ChartertMorris: @rufiojones i know how to make money on facebook, do you want to know it? [No. I’d rather see you raped by a zebra.]
- Damn I hate forgetting how to spell a word I use all the time. It’s like forgetting how to find the g-spot.
It’s too bad vaginas don’t come with Spell Check.
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