Ten Terrific Twitter Testimonials 24
When you read this, keep in mind that people CAN see you when you’re digging up your nose in the car.
- Why is there never enough lotion to defeat the ash in the spaces between our fingers?
- It was so many old people in Tim Horton’s I felt like I was watching a silent movie about donuts.
- The only thing I have less of than patience for stupidity is HIV. I have zero patience for stupidity. #HIVnegative
- Why flavor floss? Who thought “You know what would go well with this kernel in my teeth… SPEARMINT!”?
- The blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice. Women, please eat more blackberries.
I saw Jim mistakenly spelled Gym. Do you know how hard that is to do?! That’s like “I scent the letter” or “There’s no weigh out”. Amazing.
I’m back like what baby got.
- Say “Spence spent six cents since Sixth Sense sent sick scents” #3xFast
- Black jelly beans are the dung of Cerberus’ puppies.
- I pledge to confiscate Kerry Washington’s undergarments so she doesn’t have to waste water or electricity. #EarthDay
Since I’ve figured out different, more fun ways to respect Mother Nature, my Earth Days have been pretty great.
FOLLOW ME: @RufioJones