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Cartoon Black History: Slimer

September 1, 2011

Last week I brought you the story of Casper, a true freedom fighter, and introduced you to the Ghostbusters. In short, they’re “pigs” of the paranormal. The Ghostbusters have been harassing haunts for decades. Their track record is flawless. That’s because overseers oppress more efficiently when they have a race traitor in their corner.

That scumbag’s name is Slimer. He is the antithesis of Casper. Slimer cared more about himself than his fellow manes (<–click the link for the definition so you know that was clever instead of a terrible misspelling). He came face-to-face with the Ghostbusters and immediately surrendered.

To avoid banishment to the Netherworld, Slimer agreed to rat out the rest of the wraiths around the region. His only request was that they fed him and kept him safe. The Ghostbusters agreed.

With Slimer as their informant, the Ghostbusters snagged several souls. They caught so many that it became like a specter sport to Slimer. Not only did he forget his original reason for dealing with the Ghostbusters, he began joining in the persecution… just like a spook! (I’m sorry, that was very unprofessional)

The Ghostbusters deported a deluge of demons to the Netherworld. Following the foiling of the final phantasm, Slimer saluted them for their X-Files xenophobia as if he forgot what he was. But they had a way of reminding him of his place.

The Ghostbusters kept their word and didn’t send him to the Netherworld. However, there was no way Slimer would be part of the team like he thought he would. Instead, he got relegated to other duties. Slimer and Marc Summers (a guy they assaulted for being, what they called, a “ghost lover”) were forced to be on a game show. As a man with OCD and a poltergeist with palpable pride, Summers and Slimer, respectively, got to experience hell on Earth together on Double Dare.

Sure, having to slime kids on television is probably degrading. But not as much as taking part in ghost genocide. Being black and ethereal was hard enough as it was without having a Benedict Arnold in their midst. You got what you deserved, Slimer! By the way, accept my apologies for all the apparition alliteration. I do that when I’m upset.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. December 5, 2011 7:25 am

    gross.

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