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Cartoon Black History: Batty Koda

October 27, 2011

In rap, being considered the best doesn’t mean much anymore. Everyone claims they are the greatest ever. But when the most boastful people in hip hop can agree on who is flawless, that is an amazing feat. This is an ode to the G.o.A.T. or, better yet, the B.a.T.T. (Best at Talkin’ Trash)

“YEEEEEAAAAH BOOOOOOY! Batty Koda up in this!” was how he opened every show. But I’m getting ahead of myself. For those that stay under a rock, that’s Batty Koda. He’s the greatest rapper ever. However, he started in a group.

Only thing worse than a rap group named FernGully (“gully” is a New York slang term for tough or gangsta; “fern”, a plant, was their colloquialism for weed) is an album named The Last Rainforest. The CD was a mess, but there was a clear lyricist in the bunch. They didn’t like how Batty Koda was being pushed to the forefront.

Koda’s skills already caused a riff in FernGully. He was also bad about keeping his hands to himself. Batty was notorious for trying to get in the pants of the group’s singer, Crysta. The catcalls were unwelcome.

It’s not that Crysta wasn’t flattered, but she was dating Zak Young… who was also in the group (his rap name was Young Zak). Zak got tired of Batty and told him to leave. He just did it in a very persuasive way.

Batty Koda complied. He took to the mic for retaliation. He wrote and shot a video for a FernGully diss track called Humans. Koda even had clips of Crysta spliced in to further annoy his old group. Here is the result:

That video dominated MTV and BET. It was the boldest one minute song ever played. His solo career soared after that came out. Ever since, anyone’s favorite rapper has tipped their hat to BK at some point. Crysta eventually left Zak and tried to see how much Koda missed her. He just said “Baby, don’t touch the cape!”

Batty Koda sat at the number one spot for a decade while others waited for the scepter to be passed. It’s not just by happenstance that Jay-Z and Kanye West titled their CD Watch the Throne as that’s what they had to do. He is and will always be the man. I hope these kids that call themselves battle rappers remember to kiss the ring, cause they ain’t got it like Batty.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. coolbreezej permalink
    October 27, 2011 8:18 pm

    Man, listen… You are a writer like none other. #carryon

    • October 27, 2011 8:22 pm

      Thank you. Seriously, your support and give-a-shitability is why I continue to do this.

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